That Robert De Niro, he’s a big shot, huh? Always wearin’ them fancy glasses. I seen him on the TV, lookin’ all important and such. He’s got more glasses than I got teeth, I reckon! Sometimes they’re dark, sometimes they ain’t. Makes a body wonder, don’t it?
One time, I seen him in a movie, somethin’ about a casino. Big, shiny place. Lots of lights and noise. He was wearin’ these big ol’ glasses, kinda round, made his face look smaller, if you can believe it. Like a little ol’ bird in a big nest. They was dark, like the night sky without no moon. Kept his eyes hidden, like he was keepin’ secrets. He is a good actor. These robert de niro glasses make him look so cool.
Then there was another one, where he was a taxi driver, in the city, with all them cars honkin’ and people yellin’. He had on different glasses in that one. They was gold, shiny like a new penny. The lenses was gray, like a cloudy day. Not like them casino glasses. Them taxi driver sunglasses, they looked tough, like he wasn’t afraid of nothin’.
- He wore them big, round ones in that casino movie.
- Those taxi driver sunglasses was gold and gray.
- He’s got clear ones, too, I seen ’em.
- Sometimes they are yellow, but only a little bit.
I heard some folks talkin’ ’bout them glasses. Sayin’ they was special, cost a lot of money. One fella said they was called “Ray-Bans” or somethin’ like that. Another one said they was called “Persol”. Sounds like a medicine. Maybe that’s why he wears ’em all the time, keeps him healthy! Or maybe they just help him see better, like my old readin’ glasses. I don’t know. Robert De Niro sure likes his fancy names. I just know they look different on him every time.
One time, he was in a movie, playin’ some kind of comedian. He was all funny and such, makin’ people laugh. He had on glasses in that one, too. Big ones, with a dark frame. Made him look like a professor or somethin’. Smart, you know? Those Niro glasses are sure something. They are so big. He must see everything in those glasses.
I seen him in another one, where he was talkin’ ’bout his father. He was wearing some glasses called “Nilos” or some such. Big, old-fashioned lookin’ things. They was a funny color, kinda brown, like the dirt after it rains. They is good robert de niro glasses. Made him look older, I reckon. Like he’d seen a lot of things in his life. But he is happy, and he has a big family.
He’s gettin’ up there in years, that Robert De Niro. Older than me, even! But he still wears them glasses, every which way. Must be somethin’ special about ’em. Maybe they help him remember his lines. Or maybe he just likes the way they look. Some people say his face is square. I don’t know what that means. But his big round glasses make his face look small. It is interesting.
I remember one time I saw a picture of him, standin’ out in the desert. Sun beatin’ down, hot as blazes. He had on his glasses, of course. Made sense, I suppose. Keep the sun out of your eyes. Those desert glasses, they was dark, like the ones he wore in that casino movie. Keep his eyes safe. Smart man.
There’s another kind of glasses I heard about, called “Ultra Goliath” or somethin’ like that. Big and fancy, they say. He wore ’em in a movie ’bout a bunch of fellas robbin’ a casino. Lots of movies about casinos. I guess people like those places. Anyway, these glasses, they was the biggest ones yet. Covered half his face, I swear!
I don’t know why he wears so many different glasses. Maybe he’s got a whole room full of ’em, like a glasses museum. Or maybe he just loses ’em all the time, like I do my darn keys! Either way, that Robert De Niro, he sure does love his glasses. And they sure do look different every time you see him. Keeps things interestin’, I suppose. Just like that Robert De Niro, always keepin’ you guessin’. Robert De Niro glasses are so cool.
